What Should You Know Before You Make Him Your Boyfriend

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Request a guy to be your boyfriend can be scary, but it doesn't have to be. With the right mindset, yous can accept a meaningful chat nigh the future of your relationship with a guy without feeling stressed.

1. 1

   Determine whether you're gear up to commit. The decision to commit can be a tricky one. Whether or not you are ready for a committed, steady relationship can exist adamant past a number of factors. Every case is different, and you might take certain expectations for a relationship.^[1] Ask yourself:

   • How practise I feel about him? Exercise I feel excited when we are together? Exercise I miss him when he is gone?
   • Can I handle the time commitment of a serious relationship right now? What type of relationship do I want?^[2]
   • Have nosotros fought before? If so, how well did nosotros handle it?^[3]
   • Does he respect me? Are there whatsoever reddish flags I am concerned near? Am I uncertain near his character? Do I trust him?^[4]
   • How exercise I experience about monogamy? Do I want an exclusive relationship with i person? If and then, am I willing to be monogamous with this human being? If not, are both parties open to a polyamorous relationship?
   • Am I doing this because he makes me happy? Or are other people pressuring me to take a beau?

2. 2

   Take the length of your relationship into consideration. Request your guy to be your beau also soon can scare him off if the feeling isn't mutual, but waiting besides long can create defoliation and hurt feelings. Since all relationships are different, there's no specific corporeality of time you should wait earlier asking. Trust your instinct. If the timing feels correct, information technology might just be.

   • If you accept only met the guy, you might want to go on a few dates before you enquire him to exist your young man. You lot may not want to commit to someone you just met.
   • Many people ask a partner to become steady or exclusive after about 6 dates or one month.^[5]
   • Some people wait until they have dated for three months to accept the talk.
   • If you lot have a long altitude relationship, you may desire to establish this talk sooner rather than later. This will help both parties empathize what is expected even when you are far apart.^[vi]

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3. three

   Identify whether the guy is interested. You lot should have some indication near how the guy feels about you. The only fashion to be absolutely sure about his feelings is to ask him, but yous can look for certain signs that might signal his feelings.

   • If a human refers to futurity plans, it might be a sign that he is planning on sticking around with y'all.^[vii]
   • If he brags virtually you to people, particularly to his friends, information technology might show that he is proud to exist around you.^[8]
   • If he sends you texts asking how you are throughout the day, information technology may mean that he is thinking often virtually you.^[9]
   • If yous encounter each other several times a calendar week and hang out every weekend, it may be a sign that he is becoming more than invested in you.^[x]

4. iv

   Prepare yourself for rejection. While you're hoping he agrees to be your fellow, go on in mind that he might say no. Your guy may not be ready for a serious relationship with you, or perhaps he doesn't like using titles or labels to describe your relationship. Think nigh how you will reply to a rejection.

   • If you want a serious relationship with someone who will commit to you, you may accept to office ways with this guy if he says no. This will permit y'all to find someone who wants a serious human relationship every bit well.
   • If you are content with your relationship, you might decide to maintain your current status until he's prepare to get your young man.
   • If y'all take deep feelings for this guy, you might take to decide whether or not you want to hang out with him afterwards. You lot might determine to merely stay friends, or you might decide to cut off contact until you can get over him.

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1. 1

   Plan ahead. It will be easier for you lot if you know when you lot are going to enquire the question. You tin can practise the conversation ahead of fourth dimension, or you tin can identify the right moment to bring the event up. There is no i right fourth dimension to enquire a guy to be your boyfriend. Approximate your personal circumstances carefully.

   • Some people programme a special date and hold this conversation at the cease of a date. Others find that this chat comes most naturally when they are hanging out together lone. Either manner, cull a good day ahead of time.
   • Do non ask at a time when the guy volition be stressed, upset, or decorated. He may exist taken ashamed by the question, and this could bear upon his respond.^[11]
   • If you are feeling nervous, anxious, or jittery, you lot tin can practice what you will say alee of time. In a mirror, try starting the conversation and asking the question.^[12]

2. two

   Come across in person. It might be tempting to text or message a guy to inquire him, simply these questions are best dealt with in person. Talking in person allows you to explore dissimilar options for your relationship. If there are any questions or concerns the guy has, yous can deal with them together.^[13]

   • If yous're in a long distance relationship, it may not exist easy to run across upwards in person. If you can have this conversation during a visit, yous might want to look until the end earlier asking, in case you receive a negative reply. If y'all cannot enquire in person, calling him is the next best selection.

3. iii

   Determine a good identify for conversation. In that location is no 1 right place to have the human relationship talk, merely it should be a place where you tin both express your feelings and hash out your future together. Consider what is correct for yous and the guy.

   • Y'all should probably have this talk while you two are alone. You might broach the question during a walk on the embankment, at the park, or in one of your homes.
   • If there a place that is special to both of you—such as the site of your first date or a favorite monument--, you might choose to have the talk there to make information technology memorable.
   • Make certain that the guy is not distracted. Do not ask him during a movie, while you are out with friends, or when he is working.
   • If y'all ask him while yous are in the car or eating at a eatery, he may feel trapped. Have the conversation in a place where you are both comfortable.^[xiv]

4. 4

   Introduce the question at the right moment. While hanging out on your planned mean solar day, you should focus on staying relaxed. Wait until a good moment to introduce the topic. Wait for a moment that feels "right" or "special." If you are having difficulty with this, you can follow some basic guidelines.

   • If he compliments y'all, you might compliment him back, starting a chat on what you lot relish about each other. This is a natural segue into the human relationship talk.
   • If there a menstruation of silence, you might bring upwards the issue. Say how happy you are in the moment, and come across if the conversation comes up.
   • At the stop of your date or hang out, you can say, "Hey, before you go, I wanted to talk to you well-nigh something."

5. five

   Consider waiting for your guy to bring information technology up first. If getting around to calling him your "fellow" isn't likewise high a priority, consider waiting to see if your guy mentions it first. This also helps y'all feel out whether your guy is comfy with using titles or labels to define your relationship. This might be a good option if you are uncertain about your feelings or if you think that he is uncertain virtually the human relationship.

   • Practise not wait around forever for a guy to bring up the question. Set a date for yourself earlier you lot ask him. For example, you might give him a calendar month before asking him yourself.

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1. ane

   First with a compliment. Tell the guy what you like about him. This flattery will relax him, and it will make the relationship question much easier to broach. A compliment about his humor, intelligence, or kindness is a good manner to betoken how yous think near him.^[15]

   • You lot might say, "You know, you are then funny. I've never met a guy like y'all earlier."
   • Another good compliment is, "You are very thoughtful. I'm and then touched past your gestures."
   • If he smiles, thanks you, or compliments you back, it may be a positive sign that he feels similarly about you.

2. 2

   Explain your feelings about him. Once you accept started on a positive note, information technology may be easy to start explaining your feelings for him. If you lot received a positive reaction from your compliment, yous might want to delve deeper into your feelings. Explicate to him how you feel virtually him. You might explicate that you have enjoyed your time together then far or that you lot are starting to develop feelings.

   • Y'all might say, "I've had such a good time with you so far. You lot're a really unique person, and I've been thinking a lot nearly our human relationship."
   • You should probably avoid telling him that y'all dear him at this signal. He may become scared or worried that the relationship is moving too speedily. Instead, you might say that yous are "developing feelings" or that you "really like" him.

3. 3

   Enquire your guy if he wants to be your fellow. Information technology is best to ask him directly nigh whether or not he is ready to be your beau. Depending on the situation, you can arroyo this question in a number of different ways.

   • Y'all tin inquire him directly by saying, "Do you want to make this official? Do you want to go my boyfriend?"
   • If you're uncertain virtually the status of your relationship, you can ask, "Where practice you see this human relationship going?"
   • If either of you are dating multiple people, you can ask, "Practise yous want to start seeing each other exclusively?"
   • If yous want to understand how he sees you, you might say, "I want to know what to tell other people when they ask what our relationship is. Would y'all say you're my boyfriend?"

4. iv

   Institute your expectations. You both might have unlike ideas of what a steady relationship means. Perhaps he'southward ready to appointment you exclusively just non ready to meet your family. Maybe he wants to have sexual practice but y'all want to await. When yous have the talk, you both should clearly state what you lot expect out of the situation.^[16]

   • You lot might brainstorm this chat by asking him, "What does existence a fellow hateful to you?"
   • Answer truthfully if he asks y'all about what y'all look in a human relationship. For instance, yous might say, "I expect a guy to be true-blue and to be honest with me. I'1000 not ready for marriage yet, simply I exercise want to explore the possibility of a more than serious relationship."

5. v

   Give him time to answer. The guy might be feeling pressured or uncomfortable by the question. If he appears broken-hearted, uncomfortable, or hesitant, you might want to give him a 24-hour interval or ii to think over his answer. While information technology may seem as though he trying not to commit, he may only demand fourth dimension to consider whether or not he'south ready for it.^[17]

   • You can say, "If yous need fourth dimension to think about it, that'southward fine. Give it some time before you brand your determination."
   • If he asks for space, requite him space. You lot can enquire, "How long do yous call up you lot need to effigy this out?" Try not to bring upwardly the question over again until that time has passed.
   • If he does not give you a fourth dimension frame, you tin enquire again after a few days. Say, "Hey, I only wanted to know if you've given any thought to our relationship. Have you decided where we stand?"
   • Do not obsessively text, call, or message him nearly this result. If he did not requite you a straight answer correct away, you might text him once after you lot asked the question and again in a day or ii. Requite him some infinite if he needs it to decide.

6. half dozen

   Handle rejection gracefully. If he states that he does not want to be your boyfriend, try to remain positive. Try to smile, and let him know that y'all empathize. He may be content with continuing a casual relationship, or he may desire to finish things in that location. Consider your own feelings before proceeding.

   • If he wants to end things, respect his choice. Thank him for your time together, but state that you sympathize. Y'all might say, "I'one thousand sorry to hear that, but I had fun with you. Good luck in the futurity."
   • If he wants to go along a casual relationship just you lot want to finish things, you might say, "I call up it would best if we stopped seeing each other then." If he asks why, merely country, "It seems that we desire different things."
   • He might state that he wants to stay friends with you lot. Do not concur unless you are willing to be just friends. If you lot experience as though this would exist hard, exist honest. Say, "I'thou not sure that will work out for me. You're a great guy, but I think I will need some space."
   • Some men may "ghost" you or stop contacting you. It is natural to experience upset nigh this, but information technology does non mean that he necessarily dislikes you. He may only experience awkward about the situation.^[xviii]

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Add New Question

• Question

  How long till I ask him to be my boyfriend?

  

  Imad Jbara is a Dating Motorcoach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a human relationship coaching service based in New York Urban center. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, one-on-ane Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to meliorate their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the Academy of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

  

  Dating Coach

  Expert Respond

  

  Support wikiHow by unlocking this proficient answer.

  Ask him well-nigh his previous relationships. To piece of work up to asking a guy to exist your boyfriend, try asking him how long it took for him and his significant other to get together in his first relationship. That tin help you gauge how long it takes him to warm upward to someone.

• Question

  How do you ask a guy if he's serious about you?

  

  Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a human relationship coaching service based in New York Urban center. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, ane-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to ameliorate their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

  

  Dating Passenger vehicle

  Expert Respond

  

  Support wikiHow by unlocking this practiced respond.

  Ask him if he's serious most you, and pay attention to his response. Keep in mind that not answering you is an respond. If he says something similar, "We're having fun together," and then they're probably not taking things seriously but they're non confident plenty to say it directly.

• Question

  How practice I ask him to be official?

  

  Imad Jbara is a Dating Double-decker for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a human relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, i-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to ameliorate their dating lives through accurate communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

  

  Dating Coach

  Expert Answer

  

  Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

  Exist directly. It might be scary to do so, only the best way to go about asking a guy to be your boyfriend is by expressing how you feel. Y'all tin can too try asking questions like "What are your plans for us?" or "Where do yous see this going?"

• Question

  My friend asked my crush if he liked me and all he did was chroma. What does this hateful?

  

  Information technology means he likes you but he'south too nervous to admit information technology. You should ask him yourself, he'd probably exist much more probable to be honest with you. Practise it in a individual place so he doesn't become embarrassed.

• Question

  What do I if he says "perhaps" - does information technology mean yep or no?

  

  Sometimes it'due south harder for guys to understand and be sure nearly their feelings. If he said "maybe," just requite him some time to retrieve it over.

• Question

  How old should I exist to have a boyfriend?

  

  Rober2006

  Community Answer

  It honestly depends on how prepare y'all are. Some people are set up at 10, others are set at eighteen.

• Question

  I've had a crush on this guy for a long time and he asked me out twice and I said no and since then, I've realized how much of a jerk he was, but I still like him! What do I do? He also asked out my BFF.

  

  If he's a jerk then you don't need him. You deserve amend and if he truly liked y'all he wouldn't have hurt you past asking out your all-time friend. Move on and find someone else.

• Question

  How tin I tell if my ex fellow still likes me?

  

  Call up most how often you talk and how comfy he is around y'all. If you talk rarely or he is uncomfortable or defensive around you lot, he probably doesn't have feelings for you anymore. But if he talks to you a lot, tries to impress you, and/or compliments y'all, and seems actually comfy, at that place is a skilful chance he still likes you lot.

• Question

  What if he is non set to take a girlfriend, and so he started ignoring me?

  

  Tell him you understand and yous'd similar to still exist friends. Perchance in the hereafter when he'southward ready things will be dissimilar. For now, don't push, just focus on getting to know him and being his friend.

• Question

  Is it okay to date a person of a different color?

  

  Warriors4laf

  Community Reply

  Of course it is! Yous tin engagement anyone you lot want, no thing what they look like.

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VideoRead Video Transcript

• Different relationships operate on different terms and schedules. Don't be pressured or ashamed if your human relationship does not move at the same speed equally your friends' relationships.

• If you just met your crush, don't rush it. Get to know him and so mayhap attempt something with him.

• Take some fourth dimension after you become a couple earlier yous progress your human relationship. While each human relationship moves at its own speed, he may not be prepare for more serious steps, such as meeting your parents or moving in with you.

• Be clear in your expectations for a human relationship and so that nobody gets hurt.

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• It is natural to feel sad, upset, or depressed later a rejection. Endeavour to distract yourself with activities that y'all savor, and spend some time with your friends.

• Practise non harass or bother a man to get your beau. If he is uninterested, the best thing you can do is motion on.

• Do non get angry if a man does not want to be your boyfriend. There are many reasons he could have said no. Perhaps he is not in a practiced place for a relationship, or perchance you 2 are not right for each other.

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Article Summary 10

The best mode to enquire a boy to be your boyfriend is to practise it in person when yous're both alone, relaxed, and having a skillful time. Start by telling him what you like nearly him and and so explain your feelings toward him. Then, ask him to be your fellow, and define what that means to you. For advice from our reviewer on how long to give him to respond, and what to do if he says no, read on!

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